If someone has a negative effect on your life, you are not obliged to let them control your happiness. You have the power to stop them. Changing your mindset, taking things into your own hands, and practising daily self-care are just a few of the ways to stop letting someone control your happiness.
This list was compiled so that people can implement these methods in their daily lives to stop letting an ex or an abusive partner control them by controlling their happiness. The list is not exhaustive but will give you a good starting point for finding out what tools are available in this modern age of the internet.
In this article, 13 different ways you can apply in order to stop letting someone who is toxic take control over your emotional well-being.
1. Change your mindset
If you are unhappy, that’s not other people’s fault. You CAN make a change. If you want to stop letting someone control your happiness, you need to make a change. The first step is changing your mindset. This can be difficult and takes time, so do not beat yourself up over it. Just start small: take on one thing at a time and keep working towards it every time you fall back into your bad habits.
2. Take things into your own hands
In the past, you may have allowed yourself to be controlled by someone else. This is because you may have been too scared to take control of your own life. But now you need to get over your fear and take things into your own hands! Learn how to assert yourself and say no, even if it is hard at first. Start small, with simple things like schedules and chores. You will eventually build up enough confidence that you can stand your ground on more complicated issues.
3. Practice daily self-care
Doing things for yourself is the best way to give yourself the care and attention you need in order to stop letting someone control your happiness.
This means having a healthy diet, taking time out every day to be alone and have some quiet and unstructured time, soaking in a warm bath, and going for a walk or doing something active.
4. Don’t let them make you feel like you are not good enough or don’t deserve happiness.
People can be poison and people who are toxic will often try to make you feel like you are not good enough in order to control you. Focus on your own values and do things that make YOU happy. Don’t let them make you feel like you are not worthy of anything good in life.
5. Don’t give them so much control over your happiness that it causes self-destructive tendencies or depression.
You need to be able to survive without other people. Don’t let your addiction for someone or something else control you so much that you loose sight of your own well-being. You need to realize that you are the only one who can take care of yourself.
6. Find hobbies.
When you stop letting someone control your happiness, find things that make your life meaningful and worthwhile even if it’s something small like photography or cooking or gardening. Don’t let people make you feel like you are useless or worthless.
7. Find a support system.
Humans make mistakes and people who are not emotionally healthy may try to take control of the ones they love in order to get them to support them. But don’t give up on your friends and loved ones! If you are looking for support, finding a therapist that you can trust if needed can help you overcome yoru own limitations and become a better person.
8. Remember that others learn from your mistakes.
Don’t be afraid to tell people when you do make mistakes and when you learn from them. Letting toxic people take control of you will only cause you to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. There are always multiple ways to approach a problem so try new things.
9. Know yourself better than anyone else.
Being in control of your life means being able to look at yourself in the mirror and know that you deserve happiness. Some people feel like there is something wrong with them when they do not have all the answers to life or when they make mistakes, but the truth is that everyone makes mistakes and everyone has problems. Learning how to learn from people who are better than you in their field is key, but you must also learn from those who are going through the same problems as you. People with more experience and knowledge will help guide you through the tough times, but they shouldn’t be the only ones doing that for you.
10. Learn to accept others’ flaws from an early age.
Every person has flaws. The sooner you learn to accept that you are not perfect, the better off you’ll be. Being judgemental of others will only lead to the disappointment of not being good enough yourself.
It’s even more difficult to understand how one can be envious and at the same time, be critical of others. But the two are closely tied together. They feed off of each other until it becomes a vicious cycle that will keep you from leading a fulfilling life.
11. Be an example of kindness
Toxic people are often jealous and hate on the ones they see as better than them. Show kindness to others even when you don’t think they deserve it, because you’ll be surprised at how kind others can be.
12. Learn to laugh at mistakes.
Humans make mistakes, so learn to laugh and be okay with it. We all make mistakes and if you let them bother you then you will be disappointed in yourself in the end.
13. Don’t waste your energy on a toxic person.
If you do not let toxic people control your happiness, you will feel empowered and in control of yourself. You can then waste your energy on things that truly make you happy and do not make other people laugh at or hate on you.
How do you control your happiness?
So what is the best way to control your happiness? We know that controlling your happiness is not an easy task, but we believe that it is possible. We believe that you can do it. This is not an uncommon issue so don’t feel alone, we’re right here with you.
Here are a couple of tips to help you control your happiness:
1. Be kind to others.
Kindness has a positive impact on your happiness and your surroundings. Other people can be very different from you and have different values, traits, and views. But they are just like you so show kindness to them, they will do the same for you.
2. Do stuff that makes you happy
Set up a schedule of activities that make you happy so that you do not let people take control of your focus or happiness when they try to upset it intentionally or unintentionally.
- Remember that there is no such thing as a perfect life.
A lot of people try to make their lives perfect, but the truth is that this never works. There is always something missing, something broken, and something out of place. Instead of trying to fix it all at once try to deal with things bit by bit and it will feel less overwhelming in the long run.
4. Be honest with people.
Honesty is very important in any relationship and if you do not feel comfortable being honest with someone else, then it’s time to move on. Toxic people will make you feel like you are going crazy when you are trying to understand why they do what they do.
5. Take care of yourself.
You can’t take care of others if you can’t take care of yourself first! That means eating right and exercising to keep your mind at ease from all the stress that comes with toxic relationships.
Is happiness is a choice?
To be or not to be? That is the question! The answer might surprise you, because it’s neither yes nor no. Happiness is not a choice but choosing how happy you want to be, that is a choice. You can choose to be happy in any circumstance because it’s all about perspective and being able to look at life in that special way that makes things easy for yourself.
You have to be the one that controls the happiness, you can’t allow someone or something to control it for you, because if you do, they will always win.
Your happiness is your choice. You can always choose to be happy, you just have to be the one that makes that choice. Being happy is a gift to yourself and to those who love you. So be the gift of happiness.
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